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Tuesday, October 09, 2007                                                                                       View Comments

How do you handle grief?

From Jannah B

I've been thinking about Christianity and the crutch it is since my leaving it.

Recently, a friend was set alight and attacked with a screwdriver (by a complete stranger... can you believe it?) and they did not know if she would survive. In all honesty I prayed out to anything, just by the off chance she would be okay, or that it may help. I knew whilst saying it, that i was talking to thin air. But, it assisted me to cope with the grief and the anxiety of not knowing.

The question I have is, how has everyone coped in their grief since leaving behind the lies of Christianity? I have chosen to allow myself to feel out of control and know that there is no cosmic force aligning itself with my prayers.

But, I still feel the need to pray in those times of grief, anxiety or even when i just need a little help with something...

What do you do? How do you cope? How do you address stress?

Is it okay to cry to the God that doesn't exist? Is it okay to pray? Or am I merely covering grief and stress with a crutch like I did with Christianity?

Is it okay to cry out to a god you don't believe in? Or are you merely covering your crutch with another?

sidebar: Crutch implies for those that may not be aware (I dont know if this is Australian slang or international) a crutcher or something that holds you up when you feel you cant carry yourself.

from No. 3 being the one i am discussing

crutch /krʌtʃ/ Pronunciation Key - –noun

1. a staff or support to assist a lame or infirm person in walking, now usually with a crosspiece at one end to fit under the armpit.

2. any of various devices resembling this in shape or use.

3. anything that serves as a temporary and often inappropriate support, supplement, or substitute; prop: He uses liquor as a psychological crutch.

4. a forked support or part.

5. the crotch of the human body.

6. Also, crotch. Nautical.

a. a forked support for a boom or spar when not in use.

b. a forked support for an oar on the sides or stern of a rowboat.

c. a horizontal knee reinforcing the stern frames of a wooden vessel.

7. a forked device on the left side of a sidesaddle, consisting of two hooks, one of which is open at the bottom and serves to clamp the left knee and the other of which is open at the top and serves to support the right knee.

–verb (used with object)

8. to support on crutches; prop; sustain.

Where to from here with our grief?