So what should we do?

Sent in by John

I was a saved baptized, spirit-filled, born-again Christian by choice for many years and as such I knew that every person who is not a saved, born-again Christian is going to burn in the depths of hell for all eternity. I also knew that every TV show, every movie, every book that did not glorify Jesus Christ is "of the world" and therefore "satanic" for Satan is the "lord of this world." More importantly I knew that every religion, every spiritual path, every faith, every creed, denomination and belief that was not "King James Bible Christianity" was a satanic deception straight from the pit of hell.

These are the people I am surrounded by. These are the people we deal with. Should we blame them? I pity them. They sincerely believe we will burn in fiery agony for eternity unless we accept Jesus as savior and become born of the Spirit (John 3:3). So what should we do?

I just refuse to discuss it with them. Personally I can't stand anything "Christian". I feel very fortunate to have escaped this dangerous cult and am still very sensitive to the lies the brain washing so I can't, won't (as much as I can control) be around any of their songs, icons, imagery. It offends me. I’m trying to move away from that life — put it behind me. I refuse to be subjected to their mind numbing propaganda. I just hope I can recover to the point that I won't be begging Jesus for forgiveness on my death bed.

Comments

Anonymous said…
John

Sad Sad Sad
Anonymous said…
John,..I'm glad,glad,glad you're here!

This is a place where we focus more on the questions and mysteries of life,......not on having all the answers.
Stick around and help discover the peace of how not to be a......
..."Know It All Fundy Jack-ass!"
Anonymous said…
Sounds as if you were hurt very much by the Christian myth of Jesus and eternal life everlasting. Hang in there. The pain goes away after awhile and if you don't have to work with trouble-making born again Evangelicals, you'll grow stronger and just laugh at all of the absurdity of their belief system. It might make you stick to the reality of your beliefs if you reflect upon how much your previous Christian support group shares in common with the Muslim fundamentalist. One God, one belief system, and no value towards this life. Concentration is solely towards another life to come after this one. And everyone better believe this way or you will burn in the everlasting flames of "Hell House." Just on the face of it, don't you think you're a better person for finally seeing through all this nonsense?
Anonymous said…
I feel exactly like you. Was involved in A/G church for 20 years, and married to a pastor. I've been out for 6 years but still married to same person who is totally still into it. All my kids are totally into it.

You say you can't stand anything Christian. I feel the same way but am surrounded by it all day in my own home. Not sure what to do now cause I don't want to leave my family, but internally I am feeling so screwed up. I also don't want to beg for Jesus to forgive me on my death bed but its in my face so much. I can't go back to it all but can't escape it and keep my family.
Ian said…
As a former follower of the christian faith John, I can tell that as time goes on, it becomes easier and easier to deal with this kind of thing. Logic, reason, and common sense overcome the emotional manipulation and help one to see how harmful the faith can be. Just keep at it. The more you practice overcoming the negativity, the easier it will become. You can do it!
Anonymous said…
I think that sincere "religious" faith is a great way to walk the straight and narrow for people that need to follow to be whole. I see any church or temple in general as a hospital for the ill or a hiding place for uncle pervy. In many cases, religion was a very well thought out way to herd ignorant society in general. Death to the non believers; how ridiculious, petty and prejudice.
Anonymous said…
Wow, John's comment sounds like what I was brought up in. I also can identify with what Anonymous said. I've been working through getting out of the fundy mindset for over 9 months now. I still have my kids in Christian school and my husband is still very involved. It almost makes me ill to listen to the same things that used to sound so reasonable.
Anonymous said…
I've been visiting this site for a little over a year now and I've read alot of posts and comments that have referred to christianity as a dangerous cult. Will someone please elaborate on this by giving some examples of how it is dangerous? I'm tired of being in the dark, lol. Thanks very much.
Anonymous said…
You've been visiting this site for nine months? What the fuck you been reading? The Bible?? Ok Goldie, we have you!
Anonymous said…
I.S.D..If you been here for nine months and still believe there's no danger in fundy christies,then your a giant idiot beyond help!

Keep on truck'in mental midget!!

No examples,....you can't read!

What's the point? Your dumber than dirt!

P.S. You're joking,...right!
Good one,..you got me!
Anonymous said…
It's nice to blow off some steam every once in a while,.....thanks!

One example;,...the stories of the babble are myths of old, and are taught as fact,....this is called lying! I have ten more if you wish!
Anonymous said…
John,

For 40 years of my life, I obeyed, did as told, strived for acceptance.

Now that I've dished xtianity, I've decided to do what I please. Right or wrong, I am going to do what I feel like doing and I will give the finger to anyone who tries to change my mind.

For that reason, I don't talk to Christian and stay away from them. Many say that I should be out there arguing with them, trying to convince them, or whatever. That's their opinion and I respect it. Maybe someday I will feel like doing that, but till then, I will do what my gut is telling me to do.

So, my advice to you is: do whatever you feel like doing. Who cares if others disagree.

Take care
Anonymous said…
I.S.D..If you been here for nine months and still believe there's no danger in fundy christies,then your a giant idiot beyond help!

Keep on truck'in mental midget!!

No examples,....you can't read!

What's the point? Your dumber than dirt!


What's with all this freedy? I'm a fellow ex trying to learn from what others have to say on the subject of the mind cult, and you give me this rant. I understand that you're angry about how all this whitewash has affected our world, but please stop and think, before reacting. If you're not sure then ask questions. If anyone needs their heads bitten off, it's the christians who come here with their arrogant and selfish statements of how we're "eternally damned" and all the other ignorant things they say.
Thank you for your time,
freedy. :(
RSM said…
>I.S.D..If you been here for nine months and still believe there's no danger in fundy christies,then your a giant idiot beyond help!

Keep on truck'in mental midget!!

No examples,....you can't read!

What's the point? Your dumber than dirt!


What's with all this freedy? I'm a fellow ex trying to learn from what others have to say on the subject of the mind cult, and you give me this rant. I understand that you're angry about how all this whitewash has affected our world, but please stop and think, before reacting. If you're not sure then ask questions. If anyone needs their heads bitten off, it's the christians who come here with their arrogant and selfish statements of how we're "eternally damned" and all the other ignorant things they say.
Thank you for your time,
freedy.<

I.S.D., how do we know you're not lying? It seems preposterous that an exC--on top of his/her own life experience--can read this site for more than a year and not see the dangers of fundyism. Have you even read the article on which this discussion is based? You're going to have to provide some foundation, some kind of evidence, that you are telling the truth if you want us to believe that you are an exC. (You talk like a pure-bred Christian in the prime of his christianhood.) How did you get into Christianity? How did you get out? The answers to those questions should provide you with the basics of the dangers of fundamentalist Christianity. For example, WHY did you leave if you think Christianity is so good?
RSM said…
Also, I.S.D., if you are sincere in your question you will start with the example freedy provided. Since you did not even acknowledge that single example, you make yourself highly suspect for lying. With every evasive answer you make it even more difficult for yourself. We're not stupid. If there is one thing I have noticed on this site (except for the obvious danger of xianity) it is the sophisticated thinking skills of most members.
RSM said…
John said:

I just hope I can recover to the point that I won't be begging Jesus for forgiveness on my death bed.
**********

I feel for you, John. I don't think any of us can make any promises for you or provide a cut-and-dried solution to this question. After all, not a single one of us has yet been on their deathbed. We don't know how we will handle things when we do get there.

One thing I notice on this site is that many people deconvert very suddenly, and immediately feel obligated to talk to others about it. I keep thinking this might be in keeping with the evangelical mindset that one must be born again. In other words, a clear cut and definite change is the indoctrination. Part of this is knowing the time and date of when it happened.

Then there are others who deconvert over the course of many years to the point where they find they really have nothing left. Yesterday I read a very good story here http://debunkingchristianity.blogspot.com/2006/11/ex-pastor-ex-wife-ex-christian.html.
I will copy one paragraph:

"It was like I had a blanket, what I thought was a beautiful blanket, wrapped around me, protecting me from the elements. One day I noticed a loose thread and I picked and pulled at it and the blanket started unraveling. I tried to put it back, to weave it back in, but I couldn't leave it alone. I picked at it and worked at it and asked other people if they saw it and pretty soon, bit-by-bit, the blanket got smaller."

I fall into that category to some degree. There is more to it than making up one's mind. New neural pathways have to form inside the brain. New mental habits must be established. We have to find something to take the place of praising, thanking, and praying to God.

If you are at all like me you are going to find yourself time and time again in the mental habits of relating to God and Jesus. I've come across many stories and comments on this (exC) site in which people mentioned having moved from believer, to agnostic, to atheist. Thus, it seems not to be an over-night thing. I believe in order to be true to what we believe we need to understand what we believe and why. And we have to be patient with ourselves.

We have to allow time for the mental and emotional changes in our bodies and psyches to take place. I include bodies because our muscles, neurons, and other aspects of our bodies respond to or correlate with the things we believe. Something triggers the feeling for the need to pray or praise. That "something" is part of the body.

This stage alone took me the better part of a year. I'm not fully through it yet. The best I can suggest is to trust the process, focus on living today the best you know. Hopefully that will become your goal so that your mind will not automatically revert to Jesus whenever you find yourself in a crisis. Instead of praying I often talk to myself about the situation. That seems to do the same thing prayer used to do. It allows me to unburden my mind and articulate the situation. Possibly this can stand in good stead even on the deathbed. I have not been there and don't know.

Here, for what it's worth, is a thought that comes to me as perhaps appropriate for the deathbed:

"I have lived a good life. I have fought a good fight. I did the best I could with what I had. My time is over. I submit to the laws of nature. I let go."
Anonymous said…
This is a website, and only that, Ruby. How do I know for sure that you're an exer? When you think about it, all you really can do is take my word or not, it's just that simple. If you don't think that I'm sincere then that's your perogative. I'm not going to explain myself any further. I am an exchristian, period. Oh and also since freedy condesended to me, that's why I didn't acknowledge his examples.
Anonymous said…
I.S.D.,...I may have over-reacted and I'm a little bit sorry.

Did you consider how much you offended the posters here who have been explaining (very well),the dangers of fundy churchianity over the last YEAR!
Talk about condescention!
This is not JUST a website for some,and you show just how self-righteous you are by making that statement.

*I'll wait for your apology,....?
Anonymous said…
Freedy, I'm not going to apoligize to you, because I've done nothing wrong. I don't know how you get the idea that I'm self righteous. I never said this is a website for some. Maybe you need to improve on your reading skills. I was asking for information on how christianity is dangerous, that's all. Then you started blowing off your steam at me, just because I ask a question.
Apology, I don't think so.
Anonymous said…
I.S.D. "I was asking for information on how christianity is dangerous, that's all."

Just curious. If you are an exer, and you have no idea about the dangers of christianity, then... what persuaded you to leave the faith?
Anonymous said…
I am not content to come onto a site such as this and merely share my woes with like-minded people. I'm trying to do something positive. John switched from a Born Again KJV Baptist to an Ex-Christian, against all the warnings of his church, and all the teaching he had been enveloped in. What was the turning point? My turning point was simple exposure to obviously compassionate people who were non-believers.

I would like to "create" turning points. Expect to fail 99% of the time, but reach a hundred people and you make a difference.

You can join me. Just copy and forward the letter below. Join those trying to make a difference.

Thank you,
Hume Scott

_ _ _ general letter follows _ _ _

subject: Effort to Publicize CNB (Compassionate Non-Belief)

"Thoughts on Ten Beliefs"
by Hume Scott (2006).
Free for anyone to download.
http://www2.jsonline.com/idealbb/view.asp?topicID=40137

Hi, Thanks for opening this letter. I'm a non-believer. If you didn't understand that, you have to decide if you want to read anyway. I'm writing to call upon Christian leaders for compassion. You are either a preacher or someone I'm hoping will forward this letter to preachers, by email, on the church doorstep, or into the preacher's hand.

I'm a person who cares very deeply about morality and the feelings of others. I was raised in a Christian home and taught values by Christian parents, whom I love and respect to this day. The reason I'm a non-believer now is mostly because as an adult, I've learned so much about other religions that I can't believe one is right and all the others are wrong, or that God would "test" people and then burn them in hell because they "fell for it."

His God's not her God.
It's plain, can't you see?
God is whatever
we're taught from age three.
God loves us, he does.
Have faith and do well.
Have one single doubt,
he'll burn us in hell.

I'm really sad and discouraged right now because Christians are (still) hurting homosexuals. I understand homosexuality is specifically condemned in the Bible, but most sins are about killing, abusing, stealing, lying or deceiving. The sin causes another person to be harmed, which I agree is wrong, believer or not.

Homosexuals don't do any of those things. At least some don't, and that's who I'm thinking about. Homosexuals just feel how they feel and love people who feel the same way. No person is harmed. What reason does God/Leviticus have to call for their death? Bible passages like these look all too human to me, as in human cruelty. As a caring, conscientious human being, I cannot condemn, disrespect or place myself above those who harm no other person. I will burn in hell first. I am serious. On Nov. 8, 2006, my wife watched a lesbian medical doctor cry. Don't tell me that doctor was crying because Christian voters loved her so much. Loving Christians were led to hurt that doctor, without even knowing her.

Be moral and just,
the Bible's the way.
Save heathens and gays,
they've wandered astray.
They'll burn like tinder,
unless they convert.
The reason? Don't ask,
God knows who to hurt.

I want to reach out to every preacher or Christian leader in America. I can't, but I'm trying, because only preachers can change what is happening in America. Youare respected and listened to because of the many good works you do. You must question what is the criterion for a sin, faith or reason?

I've written a short book about how I feel. It's thoughts on the whole concept of "believe all of the Bible or else". If you want to convert me it will be difficult. If I want to convert you it will be difficult. Respect is the middle ground. I still read the Bible, but not with the total trust I had as a child. I also read books on the origin of the Bible, that which is known. My book, "Thoughts on Ten Beliefs" is 27 richly illustrated pages that take only 15 or 20 minutes to read. It is for Christians who have the courage to hear a differing view, the view of someone who puts people's feelings above belief in the Bible. Heaven or not for me, I will follow the Golden Rule over anybody’s Holy Book.

Preachers, they're selling
each Sunday I see,
Tickets to heaven, without
warrantee.
They're good, on my word,
just think as I do.
No buyer complains,
nor ever will you.

There are hundreds of preachers who will sell you just about anything. My book is free. All you have to do is follow this link to the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel, JSOnline.com, forum topic #40137, by H.Scott.

http://www2.jsonline.com/
idealbb/view.asp?topicID=40137

"Thoughts on Ten Beliefs" is posted there for anyone to download.
You can also post comments about the book on the same web page.

Respectfully,
Hume Scott
Anonymous said…
I have been finding a few things on the internet lately that have helped me with the hellfire and damnation that I once was afraid of. One site I found described people who used hell to frighten and / or control people said they were just as much terrorists as those who were involved in bringing down the twin towers on 9/11. I think that was a good way to describe them.

I also read that there is an actual valley in Israel (or somewhere around those parts) where there were human sacrifices (in the days when the bible was being written or before). I think it was called the Hinnon Valley and somehow from those events then there has grown a huge larger than life myth. But isn't that the way things go! Just things get so blown out of proportion.

As far as brainwashing goes. Its funny how one can get to a point in their life where you realise that you have been brainwashed for most of your life and that all the time you were told that what you were learning was 'the truth', but your mind just didn't quite accept it. Then its as if a revolution takes place and you finally realise that the doubts you had were actually your saving grace and you started to think for yourself and get free of the brainwashing and challenge everything and cleared your mind of all the garbage.

This is a great moment.

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