Sent in by Anna
I could have written the anti-testimony you posted myself. The similarities are eerie. The questions I asked however resulted in a physical beating or two (once when I was pregnant, killing the baby), but very similar. It was made painfully clear to me that Christianity..no denomination.. had a place for me. Believe me, I gave it a good go> My husband and I were even pastors for a short while. I graduated from Christian school. Had a full time ministry, etc etc ...
Anyway, Christianity is a cult!! No thinking man can reconcile the inconsistencies and outright lies. But, that is not God's fault. In fact I am sure it makes Him mad too. I will not detail in angry lamenting all the reasons why I know that...you no doubt hear that ad nauseum. Instead I offer this...
It is only with the courage to UNlearn that I learned anything worthwhile.
Like you, I walked the path of complete disconnect for a while. Not in as high tech a fashion as you have found,however. I allowed my mind (and wounded soul) to rest from the intensity of the search. After awhile however there are still things you know are true in your soul. The questions do not go away just because you have not found the answers.
Atheism is just another word for quitting. It is the path of the disenchanted who refuse to heal.
When you have the strength, and when you tire of the company of the enraged, you will resume your journey.
One piece of Truth I can share with you is....God is not in a box. There are those who say..God is in THIS box...do not believe it. Those who say He is in a box (ie..a doctrine, a book, ...have an agenda)
I have renounced Christianity. The Trinity, the word "Jesus", the 'sinners prayer', the books of Paul, etc etc ..and I now call myself a Jew, tho no orthodox Jew would agree.
God will show you the promised land...He will even open the ocean if He has to. When you tire of the company of the enraged, and you will...
you will resume your quest.
You will not find your answers in any books about religion. If you could you surely would have found them already. Instead...write your own book, the answers will find you.
In love and understanding...
A parting story, one of hundreds that I could tell you...
I had been in an accident and I totalled my car. I had amnesia, broke up with my boyfriend, lost my job...and found out I was pregnant. (that about sets the stage)..I was a "committed bible believing Christian" and I needed some REAL answers and some real assistance. My parents (christians) threw me out for being a fornicator..same with my church. It was me and God and I needed REAL tangible help. I held my Bible up to Heaven and I screamed...if this book is true then it is true for me too, and if it is not- then you are a liar and who wants to serve you anyway?? Then I threw it down on the ground. It fell in such a way that it lay open on the floor. Through my tears I saw this verse...
If you abide in me and my words abide in you, ye shall ask what you will and it will be done for you. John 15:7
I promised to keep my part and demanded God keep His part. Then I asked for a car so I could get to work.
That night at a restaurant I worked at that I could walk to, I told my friend, the barkeep, what I did. She was not a religious girl. She said..I am not trying to make fun of you, but how do you expect God to give you a car. Is he just going to come in here and give you the keys?? I said...that is not my problem...it is HIS.
The next day when I came into work, my friend, white as a ghost, told me there was someone there to see me. Turns out it was a guy who had seen me walking to work. He was buying a new car and wanted to give away his old one and wondered if I needed one. He gave me the keys, no charge, no strings. (a big white gorgeous Lincoln continental with working A/C..important in N.C.)
Coincidence?? I could consider that. But..I could tell you huindreds of stories just like this one and some of them defy physics.
God is real.
When you are done healing, get up and press on.
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